crinkled papers in the drawer (04.05)

i'm trying to erase this
but every time i open my drawer i see
black ink & promises & apologies
& i love you's

how does i love you turn to radio silence without any explanation

somehow our love has always been good from far
but far from good

because the distance could be 1,091 miles
or it could be 1'4"
it doesn't matter
i'm afraid it will always be just a little too much

come here
bend down
listen close
you're gonna need to hear this

i loved you.
and i still might.
but please excuse me
if i am no longer interested
in being the one who consumes your afterthoughts.

my pen said them too,
the 3 words
but that's what poets do--
write words on paper that we hope will affect the listening ear

but in reality, they rarely do.